Now it’s the wait and see time. I have transitioned to the “we” from the “me” part of this journey. There are just a handful of folks who are aware to some degree of what it going on with me. Looking back on this, telling Michelle was huge. To hit her over the head with this news any later would have been incredibly unfair. My goal to protect her would have caused her so much more pain. I got lucky. God certainly presented that time and I’m fortunate I took His lead. I didn’t see that at the time. I only understood it later.

Everything is actually still alright. I’m not consumed by this except when I have to go to the bathroom. So that’s only five or six times a day…plus the three or more at night before I go to sleep. So, I’ve got that going for me. Consume is a strong word…I’m still looking forward to getting this resolved so I can get my new meds that will fix this whole prostate issue up. I know it will take a few weeks for the medicine to do its job and then I will be able to start a testosterone treatment which will give me my “zip” back and life will be so much better. The guys I know who are on a testosterone replacement therapy have said it is amazing. They rant and rave about the improvement of their quality of life. This is my hope. This vision is the carrot. I am David Surber and things work out every time, all of the time.

Sunday, March 09, 2014: Michelle turns 41 today and most importantly…Daylight Savings Time begins. A year ago Michelle and I were in New York City for her “surprise” 40th birthday celebration. We had so much fun. It snowed, we saw “Wicked”, I spent time with my oldest and best friend, Jay Wright and his wife Gia and met his son again. Tibor was born on our anniversary in 2011. This year’s birthday party?….nothing. We went to Flip Burger with just our family and that was exactly what Michelle wanted. She loves her family and is completely devoted to our kids. She is a much better person than me. She wins….not even close. I collect cell phones and stack them on the corner of the table. Parker reminds me to do this when we have dinner. He gets it. Be in the now.

Tuesday, March 11, 2014: Audrey Julian is born. Audrey Julian is born to Jeff and Brandy Julian. A day for celebration for sure, I think she was born about the time I am getting some pretty crappy news. I have an 8:30 appointment at his office. I can’t remember if this was scheduled at the first appointment or later. I head back to an examination room to meet with Eric. What’s going on in my head? I am prepared for the worst and hopeful for the best news. Eric comes in and we chat a little bit about baseball. Our boys play in the same league and he is a coach. Down to business.He explains that my PSA levels didn’t go down or stay the same. In fact they went up from 7.4 to 9.2.

I have a Phd in fun. I like fun, I like to laugh. I like folks to be happy and humor is my weapon of choice as well as my shield. This is a very serious conversation. My friend has been carrying this burden and is now telling be some “not so great” news. Armed with my humor I keep my wit in its sheath and my shield on the floor. I have also learned when to shut up and listen. I may have lobbed out some “optimism” while we talked but my role in this discussion is clear. Be respectful of what Eric is saying and soak it in. I am going to have to tell Michelle and I must have as many answers to her many, many questions as I can. Michelle is a “details” person. I am a “big picture” person. While she seeks to understand the details she has an ‘interrogation style” of questioning. Its rapid fire and its intelligent. I must be prepared. We know more than we did but we still have a lot to learn. When I leave I do know one thing. I have scheduled a prostate biopsy scheduled for April 3rd.

As I said earlier I hoped for the best but was prepared for the worst. This would be considered the worst news. I’m okay…I think. I had a Chamber Lunch where I serve as an Ambassador. It was a great distraction. Meeting new members and spending a few minutes with a really positive and inspiring group of folks. Michael Giardina is unknowingly providing me some good medicine. Being himself. We will meet again in Seaside, Florida for Spring Break 2014. I’ll save that story for another day.